Just Rae

NaNoWriMo | Status Sunday

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Before I get to the official count, let me just say that Week 2 kicked my ass… o_O Daily, I didn’t break 2K once. *sigh*

Now, on to the numbers.

nanowrimo blogAs of 9PM Sunday (Nov 16), I have officially written 6,252 words for the week:

Day 10 – writing break 🙂
Day 11 – 1794 words
Day 12 – 1096 words
Day 13 – 1386 words
Day 14 – 1642 words
Day 15 – 334 words
Day 16 – writing break 🙂

That brings my NaNo total word count to 21,546 words…
Which means I fell short of my 27K goal.

Boo. But there’s always Week 3…it’s not over yet!

Next Writing Goal:
To officially catch up, my NaNo chart shows that I must hit the 38,333 mark by next Sunday. Let’s go! #focused

NaNoWriMo | Status Sunday

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nanowrimo blogAs of 9PM Sunday (Nov 9), I have officially written 11,113 words for the week:

Day 3 – 2709 words
Day 4 – 3212 words
Day 5 – writing break 🙂
Day 6 – 2434 words
Day 7 – writing break 🙂
Day 8 – 1180 words
Day 9 – 1578 words

That brings my NaNo total word count to 15,294 words…CHECK.
I won my Week 1 15K challenge! *celebratory booty dance*

Next Writing Goal:
27K total word count by next Sunday. #focused

NaNoWriMo | Status Sunday

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So — in order to hold myself accountable — I’ve decided to share status updates here each week for NaNoWriMo…aka NaFiWriMo for me. 🙂

This is the first of five posts with the last update scheduled for Sunday, November 30th, which is the final day of the challenge. Convenient, right? I love it when things naturally fall into place.

Now…on to the update!

As of 9PM today, I have officially written a total of 4181 words:

Day 1 – 2099 words
Day 2 – 2082 words

Initial Writing Goal: Commit to actually doing this…CHECK. (Yay me!)
Next Writing Goal: 15,000 words by next Sunday. #focused

Feeling Focused . . .

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It’s official. November 1st. NaNoWriMo has arrived.

All right. I’m in.

Despite the anxiety that always comes with this endeavor, I’m feeling pretty good about it. Mostly because I’m planning to deviate from the official premise of the whole thing and use the next 30 days to seriously focus on finishing my current work in progress.

This story has been stuck in me for months, and I’m sick of it. Time to get it all out and get it DONE.

So I guess you can say it’s more like NaFiWriMo for me…National Finish Writing Month…and I plan to win!

I just have to stay focused. Just. Stay. Focused.

*sigh* Always easier said than done.

Well…back to the lab I go. Wish me luck! It’s gonna be a looong month. lol

Writer Woes | Episode 5

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Fall is here. Yay! My favorite of all seasons.

But it’s also a reminder that NaNoWriMo will be here before I know it. 😐

#GameOfNovels  #AllMenMustWrite  #WinterIsComing


Here’s my official symbol & slogan — I stay losin’ this game… LOL


…but I’m gonna do it anyway!  ***cue Rocky theme song***

Writer Woes | Episode 4

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Overcoming the lows and celebrating the highs…  #ViciousCycleofArtistry

creative process


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“A bad day for the ego is a great day for the soul.”  ~ Jillian Michaels

#learn  #grow  #evolve

Writer Woes | Episode 3

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*tapping the microphone*

Hello, my name is Rae Lamar and I am a slow writer.

Those words feel weird to me. Truth is, I don’t know if I’m really a “slow” writer…I just know that it takes me longer — way longer than most writers I know — to complete a manuscript. It’s actually been eight days since I typed the last word in my current work-in-progress. I don’t always feel like that’s a problem, but lately it’s been bugging me. I just want to be able to produce without my eventual deep dive into an existential crisis where I’m questioning every other page I write before ultimately questioning whether I should be writing at all.

So many times I’ve wished that my brother and other fast writer friends would somehow anoint me with their gift of creative production. I often watch in awe as I see them putting out two or three or four books in a year…and suddenly I feel shamed because the last book I self-published was in November 2012.

That’s when the crushing guilt of not writing “enough” propels me to create new habits, change my behavior, whip out my latest manuscript, place the cursor at the point I left off (sometimes days, weeks or even months  ago…smh) and…oh yes…start writing again!

Well, sort of.

It typically ends up being more like a quick purge before I choke.

What I’ve come to realize is that I have a mind that always leads me back to doubt. More than that, I have a defiantly-analytical mind that rationally, logically, systematically and efficiently seeks ways to make improvements…so creativity doesn’t stand a chance between my ears. By the time I get anything substantial down on paper, my need for organization and for things to “make sense” has already taken over and it isn’t long before I’m rethinking everything I wrote and editing it down to a point where there’s basically nothing left. There’s tremendous value in that — a built-in bullshit detector as Ernest Hemingway once called it. It has served me well in my professional life, but for the creative core of me…not so much.

Fortunately after having some crucial conversations with myself this summer, I’ve also come to realize that my problem is not that I can’t write…the problem is that I won’t get out of my own way and allow  myself to write.

I love this quote by Author Janice Pernell:

“DIFFICULT and IMPOSSIBLE are not  the same thing. Just because something is challenging for you to do, doesn’t mean it isn’t meant for you to do.”

Baring it All: The Ins and Outs of Publishing

I think I’m going to say this to myself every day for a month. 🙂

Seriously though, I do believe that I am meant to do this. No one writes four books by accident.

So as I continue to struggle through #5, I’m going to chill and stop wishing so much for my talented and successful writer friends’ mojo to rub off on me because you know what? I’m talented and successful too…in my own way. Yes, the process may be more difficult for me (cue the added pressure of others whizzing by, leaving me behind…LOL) but there’s one thing I know for sure — soon enough, I’ll be joining them all at the finish line.

I’ve done it before and I’ll do it again…and that’s  all that matters.

*strutting away to go knock out this WIP*

#SlowAndSteady  #OwningMyFlow  #ForTheLoveOfWriting  #DontCallitAComeback

Writer Woes | Episode 2

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Growth is a beautiful thing… 🙂  #GettingBetterEveryDay

Back In The Lab . . .

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Happy Friday, Good People!

Just wanted to do a quick check-in about my current work-in-progress. At this point, I’m nowhere near where I should be, but I did have a great spurt the other day during my lunch break from my nine-to-five. I woke up that morning with an irritable feeling, like something was on me and I just couldn’t get right until I purged it — basically, my internal signal to sit down and put pen-to-paper or, in this case, fingers-to-keyboard.

And when I was done…I can’t even begin to describe the relief I felt!

You see, before then I hadn’t written a single word in WEEKS. I was beginning to think that I should scrap my story altogether. I had been stuck on the plot, the POV, the pacing…stuck on everything, really. So to finally get some words out — a little over 2K and they had the nerve to be pretty good too?! — yeah, I was more than motivated to get back on my grind.

So cheers to the freakin’ weekend and to at least another 10K words before it’s over.

One can hope, right? 😉